Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Terror Leads to Apathy Leads to More Terror Leads to More Apathy

It's official: I'm terrified for the Pineland 50k. Not terrified in the sense that I'm going to die, but terrified in the sense that I'm going to suck. Hence, my attitude toward the race over the last week or so has been...meh. I'm just not that interested. I think it's a defensive mechanism. Plus, my training hasn't exactly been going all that great. The more I think about the training, the less excited I am about running the race. The less excited I am about running the race, the less excited I am about running, period. And, that only makes me more terrified. It's a vicious cycle.

That being said, I just registered. This little graphic at the end of the registration process didn't help:


So, that's where my head is at. Not a good place. But, hopefully, some relaxed running over the next couple weeks will get me back in form. Regardless, one thing is certain:

7 comments:

middle.professor said...

Go out. Run hard. Have fun. It's not supposed to be depressing! Exorcise those little demons in your head!

sn0m8n said...

But if I exercise the demons, can they carry me?

R. Ian Parlin said...

Quit whining. This is why you taper. In two weeks you'll be gagging for a long run again and the 50k will be just what you need.

pathfinder said...

Hey, If your race goes all to hell, look at the bright side, you can resign to running with me! Besides I am trying to get two or three people who will stay in the way back with me in case I need to be carried over the finish line.....Hmmn...do I still get a cow bell if I get carried?

sn0m8n said...

But whining is an integral part of my training plan.

Kevin - It's a deal.

R. Ian Parlin said...

Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.

sn0m8n said...

Suffering is one of my specialties.